when will it happen

when will it happen.
when will i begin to unfreeze
and the ocean
leave my heart
and river my face.
when at last will i
love who i see
in the mirror.
see me look away
with eyes like
frightened deer
when we talk?-
see my bankrupt
bravado like the
evening news?-
when will it happen?-
the awakening
and release.
there are lies we never
admit to untill we
are ready to begin,
lies we keep in
the dark secret place
of the heart,
lies we prefer to live
with rather than
admit the truth...
when will it happen,
the awakening
and release.
am i ready to surrender,
to release my tired war,
to reach for peace.
when will it happen?-
only now ofcourse:
when i am ready to accept,
only now;
when i decide the light
is not that scary,
only now;
when i begin to lovingly
see me wholly
accepting and accepted...
when now begins
then love will happen.